Better Days!

What a great afternoon!

We are seeing better days.

Dad looks SO much better.  He is himself again.

 The smile speaks for itself.

He walked us to the elevator this afternoon to say goodbye.  He hasn't done that since before Christmas due to his back pain.  He got right up out of the Lazy Boy and followed us to the elevator today.  He is back to being the gentleman he is.  He always wants to see us off, to make sure we get to where we are going safely.   This just felt SO "normal" again today for us!

He seemed so happy today too.  We played UNO with Mom and of course she won!!  Why does this surprise me??  It shouldn't.  "BIG smile".  She was thrilled she'd won!  Dad and I shared a hand.  He doesn't remember how to play, but he helped me pick the cards to put down during the game with prompting of questions.

Everyone had a great time.

AND......the BEST news of my week.....

The activities coordinator told me that Dad has been to see Mom TWICE this week, going on the golf cart with a staff member. God is so good!  Honestly, it seems like we are back where we were before Christmas, before the tremendous back pain and all that went with it.

My dad is his happy go lucky self again.  I think even if he doesn't say he remembers that he went to see Mom, his spirit remembers.  It has made him so happy to see her four times this week and her too!  It makes such a difference in their lives.  Rain holding off during the main part of the day and temperatures in the mid 60's this week have allowed this special time to take place.  My brother took Mom over on Tuesday.  I brought her over to see him today with the boys.  It was a gorgeous day.  I can't believe it is January!  It certainly doesn't feel like winter!  Then the two days in between just Dad and a staff member going on the golf cart together.  I'm just so excited he can get on and off the golf cart again.  That is quite an accomplishment!

Everything could have been so much worse, my brother and I keep saying to each other.

BUT it wasn't....  It wasn't....  There is such a thing as looking at "what ifs" much too much.  Counting the cost of what needs to be done for urgent medical issues is one thing.  Worrying is a totally different thing.  I like to know what to expect.  That is just me.  With Dad's medical issues last month, we were just guided through the journey one step at a time.  None of us knew what in the world to expect.  Did he have a fractured hip?  Did he not?  We just had to wait until things were clear and evident. Thank goodness he did not.

"  Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow.  Tomorrow will take care of itself."  Matthew 6:34  

Jesus really knows what he's talking about.  And I know this!  However, I should listen and take his words to heart more often in tough times.  Lord, forgive me for not trusting more.  Yes, it's hard, but he is so right about it all.  Trusting him to take care of what we can't control is a wonderful thing.

Thank you Lord for your blessings on my family, for taking care of my dad, especially these past 8 weeks.  I'm grateful to you for giving him lots of compassionate support where he lives, doctors that are knowledgeable and truly care, and strength for Dad in walking him through it all. 

We ALL needed this good news this week!

A song sung by Aaron Shust
"My Hope is in You" 

We're Starting Piano Lessons

 We're beginning a new adventure.  (updated)

Piano lessons.

I am so excited!

I do not know how much our 11 year old son, Joseph will enjoy learning to play the piano, but my prayer is that a love and appreciation for music will be deepened and that he will learn how to read music well.  A flood of wonderful memories comes to my mind as well as we are starting this venture.  My piano bench is full to brim of my history of a child playing piano and taking piano lessons.  I have kept everything. 

We love music in this house, so many kinds.  

Music is one of those things that is necessary to my soul.  It is one of my "must haves".  It ministers to me.  It inspires me.   It makes my days in this life better and more fulfilling.  Music is such a gift from God.


A love of classical music was first instilled in me by my mother with her love of classic church hymns and Bach.  Singing those hymns in the children church choir at Myers Park United Methodist Church also helped to foster that appreciation.  However there is another lady to whom I must give a great deal of appreciation.  

My piano teacher,  Harriette Line Thompson...

What a beautiful lady inside and out.  An extraordinary person for many reasons even not having to do with music,  however I know she would not want me to make a fuss about how she inspires other people.  She is so humble, like that.   I had not spoken to her in many years, until just recently.  She came to my mother's Memorial Service at Myers Park Church this past month.  I was so excited to see her and Sydnor, her husband.  It touched me so to have her be there.  I gave her a huge hug!  She asked if I would mind sending her a copy of my eulogy for Mom sometime.  I reached in my bag and gave her my copy I used at the service.  I wanted her to have it right then and there.  

Oh the wonderful things I remember about Harriette Thompson!  Mom and Dad knew her from our church.   I studied piano with her every week during the school year, from fourth grade through high school graduation, at Community School of the Arts in uptown Charlotte.  CSA's venue for private lessons and classes was at First Presbyterian Church on Trade Street.  Ten years I watched her passion for music, her graciousness and patience as a teacher, her graceful ability to inspire at the piano.  She certainly inspired me!  I have never known someone up close and personal that could play piano like her.  She was a concert pianist, playing all over the world and in the US.  Her story and inspiration with music has made impressions on many hearts.

I'll never forget the time she once played Rachmaninoff for me.  It was at the end of my lesson.  She was preparing this piece for a concert she was going to be giving.  I was spellbound to say the least.  It felt like the walls in that room were shaking.  It was magical.


Sergei Rachmaninoff's Prelude Op.3 No. 2 in C# minor.  
An absolutely amazing piece.  

After Mrs. Thompson played that piece I looked at that ordinary piano I used for lessons at First Presbyterian Church in that parlor and thought, "How in the world can notes come out of that one instrument like that?"  Amazing.  Truly amazing.  What a gift to hear her play like that for me.  It was like experiencing my own Harriette Thompson mini concert in itself that afternoon.  She wanted to expose me to beautiful music.  I am forever grateful.  

She had a grand piano and an Imperial Bösendorfer piano in her home.  An extremely impressive and gorgeous instrument!.   Yes, I got to play on her Bösendorfer a few times during those years of lessons.  If I missed a lesson with her at First Presbyterian, I made up the lesson in her home.  Selfishly I loved that!!  It was such a treat!  The Bösendorfer had 5 extra keys giving the instrument a full 8 octaves!  Its ebony finish was like a mirror!  And during those times in her home, she didn't just give me my lesson, she talked to me about life, her family, my family and music.  She encouraged me to keep up the good work and made me feel valued as a person.

Just recently I was absolutely delighted to have found a video of Mrs. Thompson and her story behind her acquisition of her Imperial Bösendorfer.  The video is from 2010, and she is actually offering the piano up for sale.  "Gasp!" Oh my, a beloved friend I would imagine this instrument to be.  I do not know what has become of the Bösendorfer,  I should ask her sometime!  I am posting the you tube video so you can hear her play George Gershwin towards the end of the video.  "Rhapsody in Blue"......I remember her talking about how much she enjoyed Gershwin.  Whenever I hear Gershwin I will forever think of her.


Enjoy!

During lessons she always played the new pieces I was to learn first,  so I could hear the entire song.  Greig, Bartok, Mozart, Beethoven, Bach, Clementi, Debussy and more...  When she played though she didn't just play notes.  She brought the piece to LIFE!  She would move with the keys, knew every nuance, crescendo, and rhythm perfectly of the piece she would play for me.  I desired to play like her.  

She started me off with simple music from classical composers.  Johann Sebastian Bach was one of them.  I played Bach pieces often.  This was my book from those beginning years.

Minuet in G

Here is Minuet in G minor, a companion piece to Minuet in G.   

I think I love classical music:  Bach, Mozart, Beethoven and others so much because their pieces and others were such a part of me as a child.  There is something to be said about music becoming a part of you.  It is true.  Just like books you read as a child, melodies never leave you.  These composers of centuries ago had such a gift from God.  Bach had a strong faith and played and composed his music for the Lord.  He is one of my absolute favorite composers.


If Joseph could learn Bach pieces one day I would be so thrilled.  If he could learn some of those Hymns of old in the years to come,  I'd also be thrilled.  I just love hearing him practice these days.  I know now how Mom and Dad felt when they heard me practice.  Daddy would always tell me to play more because he loved the piano melodies filling our house.   We are starting at the very beginning with Joseph.   I have told him, once he learns the piano, he will never forget how to play.  It is like riding a bike or driving a car. 

An update from our first semester of lessons:  Joseph has progressed through a years worth of material in 5 months time!  I'm so proud of him and so is his piano teacher. 

Be blessed!
Judith

American Robin Morning Surprises

This morning we were surprised with a backyard full of birds.

It was not just a flock of Grackles or Starlings, though we had a few of those visit us today too.  It was mainly about twenty plus Robins.

American Robins are in our yard year round.  They have made homes here in our bushes that surround our property.  Usually we see about two to four of these birds in our yard year round, never this many at one time.  It was the most unusual and special thing we have seen this year in our backyard bird watching.

We had had a lot of rain the previous night so water was standing in our yard making perfect puddles for them from which to drink, play, or bathe.  They were also flying back and forth from our holly bushes, packed full of red berries, to the puddles.  Eating the red berries then taking a break for a little drink..... we loved every minute!

 At one point we had to chuckle because an hour would go by after our first discovery of them and they were still there by the puddles.  Then another hour.... they were still there.  Almost like people hanging around the water cooler.  The Robins were "hanging around" the water puddles.  They would take turns taking a bath and splashing in the water.  I once again took way too many photos to ensure I snapped a few good ones.  Having to take photos from our dining room window was a challenge.  I wished I had had a zoom lens I could attach to my camera.  I did the best I could.  The birds moved pretty quickly and it was harder to photograph them than I thought.


Just when we would try to sit down and start a subject of academics, I would notice something else, or Joseph would notice something else and we were captivated once again.  It was one of those mornings where you take advantage of the "moment" because you can and it's special.  You slow down and enjoy life's little gifts.


Some Robins were just outside our dining room window, usually two to four at a time exploring the standing water between our house and our neighbors' fence.  I usually don't like standing water in our yard, but I was happy that it was there today, because the robins enjoyed themselves so much.

 What an interesting morning.


What a special morning.  


Who would have thought we would have woken up to such a family of birds?  By 3:00pm after finishing our other academics for the day, the Robins were all gone.  I don't know if they will be back again in this number or if we'll see what we saw this morning again.

So beautiful...

What was so great and enriching about today was that we had already read about the American Robin in The Burgess Bird Book for Children by Thornton Burgess.  This children's book was written in 1919 and is the tale of Peter Rabbit in the old orchard and his interactions with the variety of birds that frequent there.  Children learn so much about birds just through the conversations between Peter and the various birds.  I read this to Joseph when he was in first grade and now Philip and I are reading it together.  It is what Charlotte Mason would call a "living book".  A book that shows real life through telling a story. It is easier to remember a story you read than a list of facts, which is why we use living books in our home schooling.

Right after we had learned about the American Robin in the Burgess book, Philip and I went to our field guides to find more interesting facts.  These are the field guides we enjoy using the most for bird watching in North Carolina.  Joseph and I had already studied about the Robin years earlier, so it was nice to have him share facts he already knew with his little brother.


Every single bird we have found in our backyard has been found in this little field guide, and the others listed below.


All About North Carolina Birds   By Fred J Alsop III   Look for it at your local library.  


National Audubon Society North America Bird Feeder Guide   By Robert Burton and Stephen W. Kress
Published by DK Publishing.  It has beautiful photos and is full of information on how to attract birds to your very own backyard.


Bird Songs 250 North American Birds in Song  By Les Beletsky
It is a beautiful book of illustrations with bird songs for each bird in this volume.  We use it frequently when wanting to know the various bird songs of birds we see or are curious about.  I originally bought this book as a bargain book.  Since its publication, another book has come out that is probably more appropriate for back yard bird watching in North Carolina:


Backyard Birdsong Guide of Eastern and Central North America  By Donald Kroodsma


Our favorite website for ornithology is Cornell's website, "All About Birds".  
It has EVERYTHING!  
Bird songs, photos, facts, video and more.  

http://www.birds.cornell.edu/Page.aspx?pid=1478&ac=ac

 

Learn about the American Robin on the Cornell website here.


We were certainly wowed today and enjoyed some family time pondering a favorite back yard bird.


I'll close with a photos of our nature study bird project for this year for second grade.  Joseph did the same thing as a first and second grader.  Philip is making his own back yard bird book.  Guess what the last bird recorded in it was two weeks ago?


 The American Robin!


I smile and I say, "Thanks Lord, for caring about all of those details in our home schooling."  I certainly didn't plan this bird encounter today.  God never ceases to amaze me how he weaves our learning in books with real life learning through his creation.  Little things like this happen all of the time.  I am forever grateful!  WE didn't know we'd see a "Robin party" as Joseph called it, in our back yard this morning, like we had never seen before, but God allowed us to see it and be there in those moments!  What a nice little gift!

Update!  This morning they are back in numbers of over 40!  All having breakfast in our holly bushes and hanging out in our two Willow Oak Trees.  The puddles are gone this morning.  The ground has soaked in that rain water, but it is really cool to see this number of American Robins in our yard.

My Story Through Mom's Eyes ~ Adoption day 1967

January 11th is my adoption day.

Life truly began for me on this day.

Today is also a Wednesday.... and in 1967 the 11th was also on a Wednesday.  I didn't remember it was a Wednesday that I came home, until I re read my baby book today and my mother's words to me.  She wrote all of her feelings down and every detail she wanted me to remember of that day.  She wrote like she was telling me a story right there beside her in her presence.  She kept it all in this book for me called "All About You".

She told me of her dreams for me, her love for me, her love of God, and her joy in bringing me home as her daughter.  She didn't just speak of her love for me, but for my dad, my older brother and the fact that we were an entire family.  Togetherness matters so much to my mother.  Family meant everything to she and my dad, and it still does today. 

They had just seen me for the first time, the day before (January 10th) at the agency. They could have taken one look at me and said, "No, we have changed our minds."  But they didn't say no, they said, "Yes!".  I'm so glad they said yes.  That simple "yes" changed my life.

They began the adoption process in June of 1966.  They were approved for adopting a baby girl in November.  Approval granted the same month I was born, wow!  I was right there close by in the same city, waiting  for a family I could love and call my own.  The agency told my parents that they might have to wait awhile until they found a baby girl.   My mom wrote that she thought it might take up to a year.  It took at least a year for the agency to find my older brother 3 years earlier.  Thank you Lord, that we didn't have to wait long for each other.

We just had to wait 7 weeks.

A call on January 9th from the adoption agency saying they had found me led to the big questions.....

"We have located a little baby girl, would you like to come by the agency and discuss this?"

"Would you like to see her?"

I don't know how my folks must have felt to get that call and hear that the waiting had ended.  I have friends who are right now in the process of adopting overseas.  I have heard some of their stories and they are so inspiring.  Right now three of my friends have seen pictures of their soon to be children.  The love and excitement in their voices is so touching.  They cannot wait to hold these children in their arms and give them a loving family and show them God's love.  The waiting is excruciating at times, but God is walking them through the process, just like he did with my parents.

My first picture...

 It's about 11:00am.  There's Tom holding my hand.  He's 2 and a half.  There I am with the fuzzy pink blanket he gave me too.  My mom is looking at me.  Life is a gift!  It is such a gift from God!

Mom continues to write that it is a cold January day, sunny and in the 40's.  I rode home with Tom beside me in Mom's 1962 station wagon.  I'm sure Dad was driving.  And this is the house I came home to.... right there in the same city.  A house my parents would own for 42 years and would be the only home I ever knew growing up.  What a blessing!  There are days Tom and I still talk about how much we loved that house and our family there.  It was a place full of love.  I wish it still looked like it does in the picture here.  Unfortunately due to reconstruction and renovations, it doesn't look the same at all. 

My mom continues with my story in my baby book, that I had visitors my first day home!  My grand parents on both sides of the family, my aunt and first cousin and family, and some neighbors down the street...  BOTH of my grandmothers, whom I loved dearly, fed me!

I fell asleep on Grandmama Elizabeth.  Tom still has my hand.  Mom wrote he held my hand in the car on the way home too and at the adoption agency.  My Grandmama Elizabeth, (my dad's mother) would only be in my life seven short years.  When I was in first grade, she died of breast cancer at the age of 64.  I still remember her though with a special fondness and love.

Mom tells me it was a very special day.  I went to bed at 10pm she says, and slept all through the night!!

From foster care to a brand new family who loved me before they met me..... and I slept through the night in a brand new place, brand new crib, with my forever family right there with me.   God's peace filled our home that day and our hearts.

Life is a gift.  My family is a gift. All gifts from God.  His plans for me have blessed me more than I'd ever dreamed they ever could.  I am grafted in to my earthly family and into God's family as well through Christ.

Thank you Lord for this book my mom kept for me.  I bet she might not think I'd look at it 45 years later.
I am. I've looked at it so many times during my life.  It's nice to re read about where your story begins.

Psalm 139:16  "I will give thanks to you oh Lord, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made..."

I will never be able to thank the Lord enough for what he's done for me....

This is my adoption testimony:  It was originally written last year as a blog post on this exact day.  In May of last year, I added to it for a service where I spoke on Orphan Sunday.  Click the link below to go to my blog post from May of 2010, and read  how God truly has shown me what it means to be his child, through being adopted by an earthly family.

A SIMPLE YES CHANGED MY LIFE  (Blog post from May 2010)

I'll end with a photo of a necklace my great Aunt gave me when I was 6.  It was a locket with these two pictures in it of Mom and Dad.  It was her locket at one time.  She had her initials on the back.  She had my initials engraved also and the date of my sixth birthday.  I have worn this locket with love through out my life.  I look at the photos and wish with all of my heart I could have known my folks when they were the ages they were in these photos....

I am amazed by God's faithfulness, grace and love on this day.  I remember it with my heart so full of love and gratefulness. Full to the brim and overflowing...  No other love have I seen like the love God has for me and my family.

It's All Worth It

Today's efforts were worth every minute of my time, every mile I drove, every second Mom had to keep her feet up, while I pushed her in her wheel chair across the long parking lot from her building to Dad's building, with the boys walking beside her.  It made such a difference in two people's lives.  Things like today keep me going, keep me smiling and keep reminding me that God's fingerprints are all over our lives in every detail, every step we take, every word we share, in the journey of living.  This is our life and we're living it.

Bundled up to walk over to Memory Care.  It was a beautiful day!  Photo by our 11 year old son, Joseph.

It was SO worth it to pursue that joy and nurture love.  Seeing my daddy's face when he saw us today and those big blue eyes, looking at me with more clarity of mind than I have seen in two weeks was worth it.  He wasn't just smiling for me and the boys, he was smiling the biggest for Mom.

This song sung by Jimmy Durante was all about today. "  Make Someone Happy " 
" Someone to love is the answer.... make someone happy, make just one someone happy and you'll be happy too." 



 My dad looks SO much better!  He's up walking with his walker again today.  Yesterday was a good day too.  He's not as confused because he's off the pain medication for his back.  His coloring is better.  I found him sitting in the living room reading his news paper.  He didn't know we were coming today.  What a surprise!

 He has been so worried he wouldn't see Mom again.  He has voiced this to my brother and others.  He has not been able to make his usual visits for two and a half weeks now because of his sudden back pain.  To him that seems like forever.   I didn't know if I should have told Mom what he was fearful of today or not, but I did.  I told her he didn't have a fractured hip, that he was better and getting off the pain medication.  I told her he missed seeing her so much and coming over to visit her.  She asked, "Is he crying about me?"  Oh my, her insight!  The answer was yes, but I couldn't tell her that.  I just didn't have the heart.  That was too sad.  She was about in tears when she asked me.  I just told her he needed to see her and the boys and I had come so she could.

Amazing what you can remember with dementia.  My mom remembered me telling her that Dad was afraid he wouldn't see her again.  So much she forgets right after I tell her and she knows it and tells me all the time.  Emotional things attached to Dad she remembers.  Oh how God intwines our hearts and makes our hearts in tune with our spouses!  I shouldn't be surprised.  It's been this way for decades with them.

She had a little talk with Dad about just this subject.  She told him not be afraid, she was still right there and was not going to leave him. He said it was a "different world" there where he was.  Yes, it is a totally different world without her there all the time.  I actually didn't hear the first part of this conversation.  I went to the bathroom.  My eleven year old son heard it.  ALL of it.  He told me I missed an interesting conversation.  He said Grandmom looked like she was going to cry.  Thank you Lord for letting my son see that love between grandparents.  Thank you....

When I came back,  I sat on the floor near them and I heard her say, "I love you.  I'll love you forever."  And then she said, "And ever." You know how many times I've seen that written on photographs they have sent to each other over the years?  Many.

God showed me again this afternoon to never underestimate the power of his love through us. They sat and held hands for about an hour.  Most of the time Mom was holding his hands because she said they were cold and she wanted to warm them up. Oh the little things she can still do for him that mean so much.  Just that loving touch that only she has and no one else.

Dad felt so comfortable after we got him a long sleeve shirt, that he started falling asleep on Mom.  His forehead falling right on her hand holding his.  She would have stayed there for a long time, as long as he was napping I think.  I left them for a time and came back and found this.

They had both fallen asleep.  It looks like Dad is kissing her hand. Kissing her hand as he naps.  Her hands wrapped around his, keeping one of them warm.   How much more could they minister to each other in the small, yet huge things if they were not separated due to medical issues?  So very much is what I saw today.  She helped him get his long sleeve shirt on, she helped smooth out the wrinkles, she was the calming voice, and the voice of reassurance.  All of those things make a HUGE difference.  He needs his bride.  He's always needed Mom.  He especially needs her in this time of aging and Alzheimers.  It lightens his load knowing God's gifts of  loved ones are still there with him.

Love.... it ministers to us and gives us peace.  Dad was so peaceful with Mom there.  I hated having to take her back to her building. Oh I hated walking to the elevator and leaving him all alone in his chair there with his newspaper.  "Dad, I miss you," I told him.  I do.  "We're going through this together. We're all in this together, ok?  You are going to get stronger so you can go see Mom again just like you used to."  He looked at me and said, "We'll make it work."  So typical of my dad and his "can do" positive attitude. Those exact words I've heard him say all my life.  We'll make it work.... yes we will.  All of us, whatever it takes with God's strength and love to see us through.  
 I needed to hear that from my dad today.  I needed to hear that strength once again that he has not given up the fight with Alzheimers. 

Tomorrow, my brother comes to bring Mom back over.  It is Saturday.  So they will see each other again.  Dad is getting stronger.  With physical therapy and occupational therapy he'll be back to making his visits again.  I know he's going to love that so much.  And one day in my heart I know these two will be together living in the same building.  I feel it with all my heart.  Medical issues must be the reason for this of course, but I just feel like this is the way God is leading our family.  Daddy would love nothing more. 

Make someone happy.... Three people were very happy today.